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From the Neighborhood Press

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A Sibling’s Guide to Caring for Aging Parents

Caring for aging parents is a rewarding yet challenging responsibility. Senior living communities that offer assisted living and memory care can provide assistance and support for older adults while helping them maintain their independence.  

However, if aging parents live alone, the caregiving role can often fall to family members or adult siblings. While siblings can help, the sibling relationship can be complex. For siblings to care for aging parents, their relationships must often evolve into collaborative partnerships focused on nurturing and support.  

Let’s explore the dynamics of sibling caregiving, insights, actionable advice to adult siblings, and the tools you need to care for your parents as effectively and compassionately as possible.  

 

The Role of Siblings

Siblings need to recognize and appreciate their distinct roles within the caregiving unit. While age, location, and life circumstances may influence your roles and responsibilities as siblings, establishing a clear understanding of how each of you can contribute will set the stage for a cohesive care plan.

Sibling relationships can be fraught with old patterns and issues. However, aging parents and siblings may need to put those aside and work as a team for caregiving. 

The essence of sibling caregiving lies in collaboration. No one sibling can or should do it all alone. Some may be better at handling finances, while others excel at coordinating medical appointments. By dividing tasks based on availability and expertise, you can create a balanced care plan that plays to everyone’s strengths.

 

Practical Tips for Caregiving

With the fundamentals of collaboration and communication in place, it’s time to dig into the practicalities of caregiving. 

Division of Responsibilities

Establishing a clear and equitable division of caregiving duties is crucial. Siblings can start by assessing parental care needs. Based on the needs of aging parents, it helps to create a shared calendar for care responsibilities, such as keeping track of appointments, medication schedules, and day-to-day tasks to stay informed and accountable and prevent caregiver burnout. 

Financial & Legal Considerations

Caring for aging parents often involves complex financial and legal matters. Siblings can help manage their aging parents’ finances transparently, navigate things such as wills, living wills, and powers of attorney, and stay on top of updating legal documents to reflect current circumstances. 

Self-Care for Caregivers

The role of the caregiver can be all-consuming. Siblings should recognize the signs of caregiver stress, incorporate self-care into their routines, take regular breaks, and consider respite care if necessary. 

Navigating Difficult Conversations

As aging parents require more care, there may come a time when you’ll need to make difficult decisions. When siblings don’t see eye to eye, the caregiving path can become fraught with conflict. 

Siblings may find that old familial dynamics can impede effective caregiving. To combat this, keep channels of communication clear and open. Hold regular family meetings to discuss difficult conversations and share thoughts openly. 

Care Options & Decision-Making

Each sibling might have a different perspective on what’s right for aging parents. However, if siblings evaluate care options together, they can make decisions that align with their parents’ wishes and quality of life. If decision-making is a challenge, siblings can seek professional advice. 

Conflict Resolution

When disagreements arise, it’s important to have processes to resolve them. Some strategies that can help with conflict resolution include:

  • Active listening and mutual understanding
  • Identifying the root cause of conflicts
  • Tools and techniques for reaching compromises

Support Systems

In some cases, the level of care your aging parents require may exceed what you’re able to provide within your familial unit. In this case, you can look for resources and support systems outside the home. 

Siblings can discuss the benefits of professional in-home care or consider other options. When evaluating which option benefits your aging parents, consider an in-depth look at the different types of senior living communities, from independent living to assisted living and memory care

An older adult man and a woman sitting at a table, smiling and talking to each other while holding a warm beverage.

Setting the Standard for Caregiving

Caring for aging parents can be a complex and emotionally challenging responsibility, but it’s also a deeply rewarding one. By leaning on each other and seeking the right support, sibling caregivers can create a blueprint for compassionate and effective care.

However, as your aging parent’s care needs increase, siblings may find that external support becomes necessary. In this case, a senior living community can provide a safe and supportive environment for aging parents while giving adult children peace of mind. 

If you have aging parents and seek to explore senior living options, contact Ralston Creek Neighborhood for more information or schedule a tour to experience our community and see how we can support your aging parents.  

A older adult man and his daughter smiling while looking at a photo album together.

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